Unbranded and home on the range.

Junk Food. You Know You Love It.

Yes you do. trying to say anything else means you’re in denial.

So listen up.

I think most people have been brainwashed by the health industry. Its a multi-billion dollar-/-year industry and its interested in nothing except promoting this Utopian image of what the “perfect body” is. You all are a bunch of suckers so you buy into that sales pitch and thus, in your never-ending, fanatical craze to have “Le Bod”, you will try to eat healthy, slather on all that cream and make-up, make sure you’re not exceeding some daily-recommended intake of carbs and calories, you spend hundreds of dollars at the gym or on the latest WhateverTrac fitness equipment. You cruise through the TV channels, your mind starts drooling long before your mouth does when you chance upon some specialty shopping channel promoting some dumb new product which you’ll probably pay for in 20 “easy installments” of 59.95 – oh so easy – and then you’ll let it sit and collect dust after using it once or twice.

There’s one born every minute, oh yes…and you’re one of them. Don’t shake your head. Don’t deny it. You’ve bought a lot of stuff based on emotion, you’ve been suckered by a lot of stuff and you never realize it.

You Suck.

So you’ll shell out nearly $250 for that Harry Rosen coat, even though you could have bought an imitation coat for less than half of that price. Its just because you want people to say “oh nice coat! Where’d you get it from?” and then you want to say “Harry Rosen” and lower your voice a few octaves but you wanna be so supa-slick and pretend like you buy from places like Armani, Dior, or Rosen all the time. Ha ha ha. You liar. You never would have the $6,000 to shell out for that genuine Louis Vutton bag, and even if you did, buyer’s remorse would set in soon afterwards because you realize, yet again … that there’s one born every minute.

You Suck.

So now, why deny yourself all that nice, cheap, good-tasting fast food? It’ll make you feel less-hungry, you’ll be tappin’ your stomach and have that moronic smile on your face and say “oh yeah, that really hit the spot”, all without spendin’ a lotta money. And hey, you dont want to be anotha wun of those suckers, so here’s the deal:

New England Medical Journal of Science: – People with higher cholesterol have higher IQs.

Center for Disease Control [CDC] :– Obesity has dropped past #5 on the list of top fatal diseases. Essentially it should be off the radar completely.

Think about it: – If you become a frequent customer of the local BK, they get to know you. They give you good service, after all you are paying part of their salary. You are Le Customer. They see you at the door and with a little wave and a questioning nod, they know you want the same order of poutine, fishburger and pop. So while the other poor slobs in front of you fret and worry about what they’re going to pick and pay for on their 30-minute lunchtime, you wait quietly thinking about other things. You get to the front of the line, you don’t say a single word because you don’t have to – your order is all ready to go, you just cash n dash, or swipe your card. No stress. Stress is one of the leading causes contributing to premature deaths, so why give yourself some unnecessary grief?

Go for a run in the morning. Any possible fat you could possibly have accumulated by eating such normal, widely-available food will be put to good use. Come back in, take a shower and don’t worry about what you’re going to make for lunch because you don’t have to worry.


Filed under: Exhaust, Food, Ghetto, Miscellany

One Response

  1. Almira says:

    Hey Maverick how you been? Anyways I do believe that people buy into the crap of eating too many carbs, and eating more protein and all that. To me as long as you eat everything in moderation you are fine, besides you only have one life to live, you should be able to eat what you want when ever you want! 🙂

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